savor precious last moments

I can't sleep. You know why? I'm a flurry of feelings. You name it, I'm feelin it. Everything...

I got to see my Ty Ty, er, Elder Thatcher, today. He's off to the MTC tomorrow afternoon! I was so excited to see him! He called me this morning when he got to campus (I totally wasn't expecting him yet so I had wet hair and PJs on) and asked if he could come over and say hi. I got dressed and blow dried my hair as quickly as I could. It was all poofy, but that's okay because Ty loves poofy hair the best anyway. So he and his dad, Papa Kevin (long story on the nickname... Something about blue hands and the smurfs), came and got me and we walked up to campus. While we were walking something funny happened. I was just walking by his side, and all of a sudden I see him just reach out toward me, then quickly snatch his hand back and clench the two together. He just started laughing. I looked at him and quickly stuffed my hands in my pockets, realizing what had happened. Then he just turned to me and said, "Are you thinking what I'm thinking?" and I laughed out an answer of yes. I thought this was so funny because it is just second nature to reach out for my hand. It's been that way for so long. Especially when I'm walking a little bit behind him, he almost puts his hand out toward me as a call to come to him. And that's what he did. It was SO tempting to want to do that! It was so hard to just walk next to him. Ah!

So we went and got lunch at the Cougareat, then it was time for me to go to class. Class dragged on for forever today! Finally, 3:30 came, and I walked home thinking of things I could do to pass the time, hopefully making it go faster so I could see Ty again for dinner. But, coincidentally, as I was walking home, I ran into him and his sisters outside the Fieldhouse! I was SO excited! So they came over to see my apartment, and soon the rest of his family joined us. There, they relaxed after a really long day driving 14 hours from Spokane to Provo the night before and walking around campus all morning. They put on a movie and the little girls and I baked waffles together. Oh man. Those girls are so cute. And they love me. Seriously. They are adorable.

Soon they left to go back up to Ty's Aunt Melinda's house, and I finally had time to curl my hair and wait for my friends to come over for dinner- Amber, Wistie, Rachel, Rachel Jane, and Amanda. Papa Kevin came back about an hour later to pick us up, and we headed over to Alpine where a steak dinner was waiting. On the drive I talked with Kevin, which was really nice. I told him since Ty's gone and he doesn't have a college student anymore that he can call and bug, he can call and bug me. After getting there we had fun eating, playing the piano, and just laughing and joking. Ty honored me with one last performance of the song he learned on the piano for me for my birthday- well, as much of it as he could remember. Journey is one of my favorite bands, so he learned "Don't Stop Believin'." It was so much fun having everyone together! Just like old times!


At about 9:3o, the girls, Ty, his dad and I piled back in the van to come back to my apartment for dessert. We had brownies a la mode and spent the next hour and half visiting. Sarah joined us for dessert, and we joked around the whole time, having fun. Sarah and I entertained everyone by singing a few Wicked duets, and I broke the old broom, which was then used as some primitive communication device. Like a tin can telephone. Soon midnight came, and Ty and his dad left me and Rachel at my apartment. Rach stayed with me until about 2 AM, lending comfort, and making sure I was good to go.

It was hard seeing Ty again, and having him be Elder Thatcher and not my Ty Ty. Incredibly hard. Of course, I didn't show it and was extremely happy and cheerful the whole time, because let's face it. This is a happy, cheerful time! The best ever! I am so proud of that boy! But it was weird not having him gently put his arm around my waist when we're standing next to each other, not holding his hand while walking, not walking up behind him and running my nails down his back (okay, I cheated on that one a bit, but it's his favorite!), not hugging him, and not having him randomly pull me into dance moves and dips when I'm trying to cook or do dishes... I really missed that.

I did get the weirdest feeling, though. When I was at Melinda's house, I was chatting and having a good time, but still not feeling 100% happy, you know? There is still some sadness in there. It's sad to have someone you love so much leave, knowing you won't see them or hear their voice for two whole years, no matter how good of a cause it is. But you know I was still having a good time. I was standing in the kitchen, listening on to Rachel and Wistie's conversation when all of a sudden, I got this feeling. It wasn't triggered by anything, and I wasn't thinking about anything remotely close to this. It just came out of nowhere. My mood just lifted up so high, and I felt like this was a party for when he was coming home. And I was so happy. It was indescribable. Like I had actually lived those two years. And for those few moments, everything felt like it was all back in place, like life was just exactly how it should be. Like a big sigh of relief and comfort. After I was able to recognize all of this, and comprehend what I was feeling, and what it was for, the feeling left. But it still left me with an impression of how things could be. It was so weird. I don't know how to explain it.

Well, I get to see him one more time. After dance class he's going to be in the Wilk with his family and we're meeting for lunch. Then he'll be off to the MTC with his family around 12:30 ish and I'll be left there on campus, desperately trying to shove the image of the last time I saw him to my memory so I won't ever forget it...

There were so many good quotes from tonight! But I can't remember them all!!! If you remember, PLEASE let me know!

Quotes of the Day:

Wistie: "He's her ex-boyfriend fiance."

Ty: "This finger is the contract finger, and this one is the certificate finger."

and

Rachel Jane: "Hey! Missionaries can't flirt!"

and

Ty: "Holding hands is just like an extended hand shake, right?"

and

Rachel Jane: "You're brownie can't be touching my brownie in the microwave! It's a missionary brownie!"

and

Rachel Ann: "He's bread. He needs to go away and become toast."
Ty: "But I don't like toast."
Me: "Gasp toast with cinnamon? No, FRENCH toast?"
Ty: "I like French toast!"
Rachel Ann: "Yep. He's going to go away and get better and be French toast."
Me: "He can get BETTER? You mean, better than he is now? Is that possible?"
Rachel Ann: "Yep. And you are going to have to become syrup. That's why you're not locking yourself away. Because you can't put just plain sugar on French toast. You have to go and have fun, grow, and turn into syrup."

and

Me: "Do you think if I ride a motorcycle I'll hear his voice in my head?"
Rachel Ann: "No."
Me: "What if I jump off of a cliff?"
Rachel Ann: "No!"
Me: "How about if I go hiking?"
Rachel Ann: "No way!"
Me: "Don't worry. I'll take Jacob with me."

PICTURES!!!